I feel like this has been happening lately with me and hubby. In so many areas of our life, I feel so much resistance. When we prayed about it all, and made the decision to move across the country, I truly felt God's hand in all of it. I knew He was guiding us in our move, and for the most part, we came across wonderful blessings in finding jobs, and getting everything in our lives mostly settled. As settled as they can be living in a basement in hubby's parents' house. Overall, He was guiding us here. Now that we are here, I am starting to feel... lost. I'm not sure even that is the right word. Yes, we have been blessed to find jobs very quickly in a state where people have been unemployed for years. We have found GOOD jobs at that. We are slowly getting out of debt, and getting to a point where we can move out of my in-laws house, and something else hits.
This time, it was more of hubby's health stuff. The mass in his lungs, that FL docs attributed to sarcoidosis, is still there after his most current CT scan - one done up here in MI. So now, we have to find out why it's there, and what it is. We also have NO idea how much all this is going to cost. Oh, and we JUST finished paying off all his medical bills. As these things keeps happening, it makes me wonder, are the desires I have to be completely out of debt and own a small home where i can have a small garden to help feed us really a God-given desire? As we get rid of bills and find ourselves closer to being debt free and possibly getting into home ownership, things happen that make me wonder if what I'm after is truly what God has in store for me. For us.
Or is questioning everything just something else? Perhaps the adversary making me question whether or not that these things are the path that God truly wants me to be on?
I'm praying about all of this, because hubby's health is only one area in which I have been meeting with much resistance. There's a lot that has been going on making me question the things we are doing. Making me question the life we both feel so drawn towards...
Prayerfully considering all options at this point, and waiting for God to show us where we are to go. In what direction to head next.