Monday, November 28, 2011

I've been having a hard time...

... finding time to update my blog. With moving in with the in-laws, and finding a job (part-time breakfast sandwich person at Panera) and just trying to get my life to resemble some form of normalcy, I'm finding less and less time for the things I love doing. I haven't been able to sit down and even really finish unpacking! which is so unlike me. Through all of this feeling like everything is still in a whirlwind, I have realized there are many things for which I can be thankful, if I only choose to be.

For starters, I found a job. Sure it's part-time. Sure, it's not necessarily something i LOVE, but i do enjoy serving others, and in a way, that is what I'm doing. I'm thankful for this job because it means hubby and i can afford our car (maybe not the insurance but at least the car!). it means we have a small amount of income, which is very important to have. i'm thankful for this income because even though he had received many calls from places wanting to interview him, most have not called back to schedule interviews, and he has still not found a job. he has been sitting at home for almost one month, and i must say, it has been driving him crazy. which in turn, makes me feel terrible watching him have to go through all this mental anguish. he does joke about it, and i'd glad he hasn't lost his sense of humor. his latest joke is:

"i provide for my baby! i provide a nice basement for my baby. a nice basement in my parents house!"

which brings me to the next thing on my list. in-laws who are willing to provide us food and shelter while we look for jobs and get ourselves settled. i realize that i'm not always the easiest person to get along with. i'm opinionated, stubborn, loud, outspoken, and i come from a oompletely different culture than everyone else in the household. my hispanic heritage and southern upbringing can be very prominent at times. especially when compared to their more reserved midwestern manners. neither is better or worse than the other, only different and can take some time to get used to. so, sure, there have been misunderstandings, but im thankful that through these misunderstandings, there is enough love in their hearts to not kick us out of their home. :-) like i said, i can be difficult.

yet my husband loves me and wants to see me happy. another thing to be thankful for. i know how hard it is on him to not be making much money. i know how difficult it is for him to be going through all this as well. going from man of the house where he had a say in everything that was going on, to be back as the son having to listen to his father and do what his parents want in his parents way. it's not always easy once you have been out on your own to return to that. but im thankful that he handles it so well, and still manages to show me how much he cares. seeing his example helps me so much, especially when i'm entering into a family dynamic that is foreign from my own. it's like night and day sometimes, but his example has helped me so much more than i can say.

even with all these things for which i am thankful, there are many things that i truly miss. my friends for example. i may not have seen them a lot, but all my friends are still in Florida. moving cross country and leaving behind the familiar for the unfamiliar has taken its toll. even something has simple as driving up here is different. not only do i have to learn to navigate a new city, where at certain lights you have to make a "michigan left," i'm also finding that people up here are much more aggressive drivers here than in florida. some of them needlessly so. then there is the cold. i actually like this part of adjusting to a new place, but it's still something new to get used to.

like the other morning when it was 29 degrees when i had to go into work. 4:30 in the morning and my car was covered in ice... i had NO idea what to do and had to wake up my husband to help me scrape the ice off. i didnt even know what the tool looked like :-P i was almost late to work. my coworkers did find it funny though, and i suppose it will give me a good story to tell in the future...or the present...

overall, things are good, just taking some time to adjust. maybe once things settle down after the holidays, and the hubby and i get our own place things will be a little more "normal" for me. maybe they wont. i'm really learning to rely on God a lot more to get me through my days. i don't know what the new normal is going to be like. i just know that i dont know how people manage to do it. move across the country all by themselves with only a job lined up, and sometimes not even that. i know i would not be doing as well with all the changes in my life if it werent for my husband. so i have to give him a major thank you for being there for me when i need him.... which is quite a lot... :-P

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