Sunday, July 3, 2011

An Interesting Conversation About Modesty With a Guy

The other day I went with some friends to Universal to ride some roller coasters and just have fun. The parks were a bit crowded, but overall it was a great day. Especially once it rained and the park wasn't so ridiculously hot anymore. While there, I decided to talk to one of my friends about modesty. I think I'm going to have these conversations more often with my guy friends because it truly shows that not all guys think the same way.

The conversation started when the two of us girls started wondering at some of the outfits people were wearing. Now, we are not fashion savvy girls. Personally, I only enjoy fashion to a small degree. I can tell you what is in style and how to pair it up and make it work for different occasions. But I can't stand actually going through that whole routine EVERY day. So yes, some times it makes me feel a bit frumpy and ungirly, but to be fair, I've never really been into that kind of stuff. I'd rather sit down and play a good video game or read a book. Style for me consists of a tee shirt with either a skirt or jeans, or capris, or long shorts. It's basic, functional and no fuss.

Definitely not the stuff we were seeing in the parks. We saw older women, who looked above 50 to be wear skimpy little tops that left nothing to the imagination with short shorts that were the size of underwear. We saw mothers allowing their daughters to wear tops that didn't cover any of their stomach, and even shorter shorts than we saw on the older women! Now, I'm not saying that every person can't decide for themselves what to wear or how to wear it. I believe modesty is best and if I were to be perfectly honest, I both envy and pity them. I envy the fact that they can see so comfortable in their own skin. Yet I pity them because I know what motivated me when I dressed more like that, and it's not going to make them feel better or sexier. In fact, it's only gonna end up making them feel worse inside. Okay, not always but usually. Most of the girls i know that dress the way these people we noticed dressed tend to actually not be comfortable in their skin, though they appear to be so, and feel that they have to put sex on the table (even just as an option they may never use) in order to get a guy. They dress in ways and act in ways that weill cause guys to want them because they "look hot".

Now, our noticing this had less to do with modesty, than it was because we had to wonder about why people wear the things they wear to theme parks. The sun beating down on you is going to feel worse on your bare skin than it will through a shirt. Yes, I know the Florida humidity is hot, but it's much easier to bear the humidity than the sun. I've lived here all but one year of my life. I've kind of had to learn how to deal with it, although I myself do sometimes get sick in the heat even still. The worst thing you can actually do in the heat here in Florida is believe that less clothing covering you is going to make you feel cooler! Yes tnak tops are fine. But the more skin exposed to the sun's rays, the hotter you are going to be.

Not to mention, a lot of the girls we were staring at in wonder over their choices for theme parks, we couldn't tell how old they were. They looked like maybe 15 or 16, but their clothing choices screamed 25. MY poor guy friend who was there was talking about how you can't tell anymore. He's like "once you leave high school, it becomes difficult. and the farther along in college you are, the more difficult it is to know how old a girl is and whether it's ok to make a move on her."

Now, the guy friend in question is not very conservative. He believes in God, but doesn't really care for the Bible. So when I asked him about whether or not he finds himself more attracted on a physical level to girls who dress in one way over another. His response kind of threw me for a loop. He basically said that for him, it doesn't really affect him that much. Mainly because he doesn't allow himself to think about it. He also said that he noticed lately it took a lot more than a great body to get him interested in a girl. Sure, a great body helped, but it was more about her and her personality, and so he started including that into his whole "rating system." How attractive a girl is to him depends on more than just how she looks physically, but also who she is and her personality. He did mention that this was a little bit newer and that it was something he was realizing more as he got older. Now, I could have misunderstood some of what he said, and he could have misunderstood my questions. Nevertheless. I found the conversation to be very interesting. In a way, it kind of confirmed somethign my cousin George and I talked about recently. It's not always what you are wearing, but how you act in what you are wearing.

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